Our Journey--A Little Background Info

Marriage is a lot like this bridge, battered by forces inside and out, and often attacked from all sides. But the strongest ones find a way to continue to stand. Sometimes they are just “built” well. Other times a little (or a lot), of reinforcement is needed. But with hard work and mature, responsible, loving communication, your marriage, like this bridge, will stretch far into the future and remain standing as long as you both shall live....

Keys to Success


  1. -Love

  2. -Prayer

  3. -Respect

  4. -Communication

  5. -Devotion

  6. -Commitment

  7. -Regular Attention

  8. -Flexibility

  9. -Common Goals


We have been married since 1991 and it is a 2nd marriage for both of us. We have been through one of the worst experiences in the human condition--the break-up of a family. Divorce is among the leading triggers of stress, depression, health problems, and even homicide and suicide. There are few things more painful than a marriage in trouble. But there is nothing quite as wonderful and special as a long and happy marriage.

Somehow, God led us to one another and we have managed to stay very happily married for almost 20 years. People who know us well are always asking us the secret to our happiness together. The truth is, there is no one secret, just lots of things that build upon each other. And when one component gets “off track” (and they do), it affects all the others. We have to step back, take stock, make corrections, and forge ahead. And to do that effectively, we regularly seek God’s guidance, wisdom, forgiveness, and grace.

Do we have all the answers? Certainly not. Our marriage is a work-in-progress, just like everyone else’s. But the key thing that may distinguish our marriage from some that don’t make it is this: We are committed to THE COMMITMENT. So what does that really mean?

As you know when you marry, you commit yourselves to one another. You form a strong and hopefully, lasting connection. But when life becomes rough and things start to go wrong, it is often hard to maintain that connection to one another. You may be hurt, disappointed and even angry. And when you begin to slowly disconnect from one another, your commitment to each other erodes, a little at a time.

For your marriage to survive the trials (and make no mistake--EVERY marriage is tested--often), you must stay committed to the commitment--THE MARRIAGE. You must think of it as another “being” to consider. It is not just what is good for you, or what your spouse wants, but rather what is best for THE MARRIAGE. When you stay connected and committed to THE COMMITMENT--THE MARRIAGE, even if you don’t feel connected (or committed) to one another, you can weather the trials and storms of life. If you put THE MARRIAGE first, rather than your own desires, then THE MARRIAGE can, and will, survive. And it will grow stronger and deeper with every test that you survive.

That is not to say that it survives at the expense of the individuals involved.  Clearly, compromises and adjustments must be palatable to both of you. But if you never lose sight of your real objective, then with God’s help, you can move together along the path that God intends for you. And remember, you must BOTH be dedicated to this endeavor. One partner cannot accomplish this alone. It is an amazing, and often challenging, but VERY REWARDING journey that begins with a simple, “I DO”...

                                                               Herb and Deborah Thompson

                                                      Happily Married and STILL Working On It

Our Journey